10-02-15
I started this blog to document my journey of faith.... But in truth I haven't documented much of the journey because of fear.
Fear of being exposed....
Fear of judgment......
Fear of admitting truth.....
It was the documentation that provoked the fear.
The Journey never ended.... but documenting meant exposure for more than my internal eyes to see. Maybe it is time to end that fear..... not worry if the words are read.... not worried if they are not read. Not taking the judgment because those who judge are not walking the path I am on because I do believe our journeys are designed to be individual with other just walking steps with us or just crossing our paths for a moment. So why give such control to ones who don't answer to the journey designed for me
This week I received a few gifts in this quest. A good discussion on the importance of confession. And a dear friend telling me her faith is stronger even without the rescue. Maybe that isn't really the gift because, that is the one thing that started this quest, realizing that the rescue may never come.... and knowing the full effect it has had on my spiritual life. Not really in a negative way, not at this point,
but in the beginning yes....
it was somewhat destroying and reeling.
Because the majority of what was taught was not truth but mans twist on truth and attempt to manipulate people to buy into it....
Not teaching His love.... His truth....
That suffering, and lack of rescue on how I would define it wont be part of the plan but Him walking it out with us is a promise.
I like the lessons that He is teaching but it is painful and makes me vulnerable which is hard to allow people to see. But maybe shared it will help because I am learning that I am not the only one that is learning this lesson....
Fear of being exposed....
Fear of judgment......
Fear of admitting truth.....
It was the documentation that provoked the fear.
The Journey never ended.... but documenting meant exposure for more than my internal eyes to see. Maybe it is time to end that fear..... not worry if the words are read.... not worried if they are not read. Not taking the judgment because those who judge are not walking the path I am on because I do believe our journeys are designed to be individual with other just walking steps with us or just crossing our paths for a moment. So why give such control to ones who don't answer to the journey designed for me
This week I received a few gifts in this quest. A good discussion on the importance of confession. And a dear friend telling me her faith is stronger even without the rescue. Maybe that isn't really the gift because, that is the one thing that started this quest, realizing that the rescue may never come.... and knowing the full effect it has had on my spiritual life. Not really in a negative way, not at this point,
but in the beginning yes....
it was somewhat destroying and reeling.
Because the majority of what was taught was not truth but mans twist on truth and attempt to manipulate people to buy into it....
Not teaching His love.... His truth....
That suffering, and lack of rescue on how I would define it wont be part of the plan but Him walking it out with us is a promise.
I like the lessons that He is teaching but it is painful and makes me vulnerable which is hard to allow people to see. But maybe shared it will help because I am learning that I am not the only one that is learning this lesson....
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